After half the men in the congregation showed up in shorts this past Sunday, Pastor Carl is now enforcing the church’s long standing no shorts rule. “It’s been on the books for decades, but this is ...

Area man Dave Kehler immensely enjoyed his time at the Anabaptism 500 celebrations in Zurich this week, but the pleasant festivities contrasted with the rather unfriendly greeting he received on his ...

Area man Neil Reimer has been awakened from his meddaschlop this afternoon to attend to an emergency at the Klassen gathering. “Get here fast, Neil,” said Mrs. Klassen, “and bring your rod and reel” ...

David Yoder was excited to return to the land of his ancestors this week for the Anabaptism 500-year anniversary, but as soon as he arrived, he got the sneaking suspicion that things must have changed ...

A seventeenth century German hymn popular with Mennonites has won the 2025 Eurovision song contest. “Normally, we only accept newly-written songs, but we figured this one had enough age on it that we ...

It’s the most anticipated race of the past five centuries. This week, thousands of Mennonites will gather in Switzerland and race through Zurich in the exhilarating Anabaptist 500. “Of course, we’re ...

After having its funding dramatically reduced in recent weeks, Harvard University has had to result to a tried and true method of raising money – a Mennonite-style quilt auction. “At this point, we ...

Area man Roger Goertzen, 46, was so aghast at what the videos he was watching on TikTok this afternoon that he started yelling through the door at anyone who was in proximity to hear. “Oba, waut de ...

The White House’s new $175 billion ‘golden dome’ defence program seems bound for completion this week after the administration got the Mennonites on board. “Nah, junges, normally we only have the ...

So the other day I noticed that Meta AI was posing questions below my articles on Facebook –they’ve been doing it for a while now. Recently, they posed a question about Mennonite jokes. So I asked ...

Minutes after discovering the NHL has changed its rule and now allows pucks to be kicked into the net, Dallas Stars GM Jim Nill got on the phone with soccer superstar Lionel Messi. “Heck, if he’s ...

A new agreement between the Tabor College Bluejays and the City of Toronto, Canada will have slumping players sent down to play at the Rogers Centre. “We had a couple relief pitchers who struggled ...